tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518800171649154035.post828325071819245768..comments2024-01-30T05:22:06.674-08:00Comments on A Majority of Two: Think Before You SpeakJohttp://www.blogger.com/profile/03382221688268676914noreply@blogger.comBlogger29125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518800171649154035.post-35019973225600123972009-07-06T09:09:04.614-07:002009-07-06T09:09:04.614-07:00What a great post! It really made me think about ...What a great post! It really made me think about raising my son now because I have been talking to parents (parent who I think are great at raising their kids) and their kids have physically attacked them. Is this inevitable? When I was really bad when I was growing up, my mom would call me a twerp. I hate that word more than anything to this day. It signified that she was outraged with me and what a pain I was to her.Katehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04861565626815452648noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518800171649154035.post-84163370212928750292009-07-05T21:43:30.592-07:002009-07-05T21:43:30.592-07:00Jo, I think you are an absolutely lovely person, j...Jo, I think you are an absolutely lovely person, judging by the thoughts that run through your mind, and end up here. You think of others, you care about being decent and kind. I'm also sure you are right, your mother didn't mean any harm, but to a sensitive soul those remarks do sting, and remain. My mother used to say, "I can't stand the sight of you." She's Scottish, it was just something she'd heard growing up, she certainly didn't mean to make me feel worthless, but oh how I thought it must mean I was just monstrous to behold! <br /><br />I think some people are born broken, but they are terribly rare. The old nature vs. nurture debate holds true for most of us though. My son was born with a sunny disposition, but even the smallest criticism hurts him so. Remembering my mother's phrasing, I've always tried to be aware of that, and be careful. <br /><br />I think it was Gandhi that said, "Be the change you want to see in the world." None of us can be perfect, but we can try to be as mindful of our actions as we can be. We're all just trying, I suppose, but we could do with trying a bit harder from time to time. <br /><br />Isn't it funny, though? I've known some wonderful human beings, and a few that simply were not wonderful. It was the wonderful people that worried whether or not they were good people. The ones that were decidedly not, seemingly never experienced that concern. <br /><br />I guess people worry about that when they actually care about being good. Those that care seem more likely to actually achieve that goodness.Land of shimphttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15671954452597068904noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518800171649154035.post-66231235058488820862009-07-05T15:54:22.208-07:002009-07-05T15:54:22.208-07:00I realize this is blogland, but you seem A-OK to m...I realize this is blogland, but you seem A-OK to me!larkspurhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12809735972126556232noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518800171649154035.post-73460831825932243872009-07-05T10:16:57.901-07:002009-07-05T10:16:57.901-07:00I wasn't nearly finished with my comment when ...I wasn't nearly finished with my comment when my quick nimbled finger hit the publish key! geezzz...<br /><br />I can very much agree with your post today. Although I consider myself to be bitchy at times, I never, repeat never, would say the things out loud that my ex-best friend would release from her mouth. Our thoughts are not meant to be shared 100% of the time. Just because we all may be thinking it does not mean someone needs to verbally confirm. <br />I would never, never spill out insults or in some case, state the obvious. The truth hurts, right? <br />As for you, Jo, I would never, ever think of you as a naughty, negative, bad person. Just the opposite. <br />I think, there should be more people such as yourself in this world because this world would be such a better place.Debhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04787912254932077059noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518800171649154035.post-40747820381435313152009-07-05T10:12:10.611-07:002009-07-05T10:12:10.611-07:00Oh my gosh! Your post today really hit home with ...Oh my gosh! Your post today really hit home with me. Whew!Debhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04787912254932077059noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518800171649154035.post-2391155793005092322009-07-05T08:32:12.541-07:002009-07-05T08:32:12.541-07:00Being a parent is not easy and sometimes even exas...Being a parent is not easy and sometimes even exasperating. I think that we tend to learn parenting skills from our own parents, whether good or bad. I think that the parents of our generation (the old- school way of thinking) especially repeated this learned behavior.Margueritehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15846051579802335412noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518800171649154035.post-12939143309733745842009-07-05T07:38:13.481-07:002009-07-05T07:38:13.481-07:00Oh my goodness...this is the most insane thing.......Oh my goodness...this is the most insane thing....I got here through about six...yep...six other blogs...just browsing and then look what you posted and what I posted yesterday... Want to hear something else very 'strange'? I live in the same vicinity as you YET...I found you from browsing in India...interesting indeed. <br />http://trish-schemmelhos.blogspot.com/2009/07/six-steps.htmlTrishhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13953079867758399259noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518800171649154035.post-3311581482015970572009-07-05T07:00:06.720-07:002009-07-05T07:00:06.720-07:00Jo-
By all means give yourself a break. I admit t...Jo-<br />By all means give yourself a break. I admit to being programmed the same way. I don't remember being told I was bad, but had a fierce need to keep the peace and make people happy because somewhere inside I felt I was not good enough. This limitation many of us have also leads to one of the great human conditions which is to do more with the time we have here.<br /><br />As far as the actions and deeds of others.... That is a tough one. Just as you have been programmed to feel one way about yourself and bring that to everything you do others have there own things they have been forced to reconcile and other times it is just plain insensitivity.<br />I like how Garrison Keilor closes his 'writer's almanac' show. Be kind to each other and do good work. We could all learn to live by that one.<br /><br />CarlCarlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09751363280115223716noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518800171649154035.post-39299850752318420652009-07-05T03:46:22.895-07:002009-07-05T03:46:22.895-07:00Be glad your parent didn't hit you upside the ...Be glad your parent didn't hit you upside the head and let you know in no uncertain terms that you were "too goddamn stupid to go to school"<br /><br />I would have been grateful to be called naughty. On the other hand his remark had the unintended consequences of making me into the me I have become. Nothing.the walking manhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10058913927297370740noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518800171649154035.post-19099973098726833632009-07-05T01:04:40.658-07:002009-07-05T01:04:40.658-07:00I was never a naughty kid. I sometimes now enjoy d...I was never a naughty kid. I sometimes now enjoy doing things that might be a little naughty ;-)lovelyprismhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09288078574913082064noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518800171649154035.post-48084827138377621262009-07-04T23:43:48.377-07:002009-07-04T23:43:48.377-07:00You have taught me a good lesson Jo!! even though ...You have taught me a good lesson Jo!! even though i think before i speak it hurts somebody! .. from now on i will think twice before i speak!Swethahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11399105855566223566noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518800171649154035.post-91185834894180561842009-07-04T22:58:16.278-07:002009-07-04T22:58:16.278-07:00Has someone hurt your feelings lately, Jo?????
...Has someone hurt your feelings lately, Jo?????<br /><br /><br /><br /> ~Lorna<br />____________________________________Patsyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17253618577306258135noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518800171649154035.post-28334731421403136752009-07-04T21:29:06.717-07:002009-07-04T21:29:06.717-07:00You are so right and I wish more people would take...You are so right and I wish more people would take note. <br /><br />I agree with Paula - the act and the person are separate. Oh I hate to think of things I may have said to my daughter when she was little - I may have to have this same conversation with her.<br /><br />I know I carry things with me from childhood and its a battle I play out in my head from time to time too. something or other will trigger it. A healthy self esteem is the best gift we could give children.<br /><br />A thoughtful post from a thoughtful person.Lillyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14597193176450931002noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518800171649154035.post-57145778934230378772009-07-04T21:05:35.548-07:002009-07-04T21:05:35.548-07:00Great , sentimental and wonderful post!!!
Congratu...Great , sentimental and wonderful post!!!<br />Congratulations.<br />I´ll follow you.<br />Have a nice weekend!Lau Milesihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09931841226037689432noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518800171649154035.post-36640631031940944022009-07-04T20:58:19.855-07:002009-07-04T20:58:19.855-07:00I did feel like you. My mother always told me that...I did feel like you. My mother always told me that "I'm naughty", then I started to believe that I really am ever since. And unfortunately I still consider myself naughty until now, even though some people are still convincing me that I'm actually a good person.<br />XDThiea Arantxahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15296769671488712305noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518800171649154035.post-73607496990331982202009-07-04T17:28:15.187-07:002009-07-04T17:28:15.187-07:00I hear you, Jo. For me, this is a lifelong quest,...I hear you, Jo. For me, this is a lifelong quest, to believe in myself and not be my own worst critic.<br /><br />We may not be perfect but I think we're both OK :)<br /><br />Cheers and take care,<br />CarolynC Shttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07441685937779844643noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518800171649154035.post-68318687349601365702009-07-04T17:22:25.860-07:002009-07-04T17:22:25.860-07:00I dont ever remember being told I was naughty, but...I dont ever remember being told I was naughty, but I do remember getting in trouble sometimes!<br /><br />What a good post and perspective you shared with us all today.Alexandra MacVeanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17317852980496492650noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518800171649154035.post-27607789505224981552009-07-04T16:55:19.287-07:002009-07-04T16:55:19.287-07:00Would like to thank you very much for this entry o...Would like to thank you very much for this entry of yours.roberthttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05457724318596670810noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518800171649154035.post-16461280061212196192009-07-04T16:47:42.432-07:002009-07-04T16:47:42.432-07:00We have no idea where the ripples will stop when w...We have no idea where the ripples will stop when we throw a stone into a lake, and it is the same with our actions and words.<br /><br />My mom used to tell me...."I should have known I couldn't make a silk purse out of a sow's ear." I don't think she knew how much that hurt me.kenjuhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07342414519714356343noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518800171649154035.post-3325206093533932832009-07-04T16:33:07.248-07:002009-07-04T16:33:07.248-07:00I think as an older human my purpose is to let yo...I think as an older human my purpose is to let younger people know the mistakes i made and HOW and WHY they they were wrong.This is one of the BIG mistakes I made. I realized one day my 3 children must think they are be baddest, dumbest kids on this planet just by what i have said to them . I was horrified. This is an amazing post Jo , so important and a MUST KNOW for all parents. Thank you Jo!Leilani Tresisehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07143465112275442843noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518800171649154035.post-38028750317112657702009-07-04T16:27:36.353-07:002009-07-04T16:27:36.353-07:00Being with my 7 year old niece today I'm not s...Being with my 7 year old niece today I'm not sure "innocent" is the right word - she has a definite love of pushing adult buttons & does it VERY well. BUT, she's a delightful, beautiful, bright, agile, wonderful girl. I hope she hears those adjectives in her head when she grows up instead of "No!"The Bughttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07509037206264761261noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518800171649154035.post-12760898391509374682009-07-04T15:06:21.750-07:002009-07-04T15:06:21.750-07:00There is an enormous difference between "bein...There is an enormous difference between "being naughty" and "doing something naughty." Children innocently fall in the latter category. We weren't born with a built-in instruction book with all the rules - time and understanding parents provide the rules that are important.Paula Sladehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/02923061193682673368noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518800171649154035.post-23562522623012130722009-07-04T14:57:12.297-07:002009-07-04T14:57:12.297-07:00That was a great post. I think by being aware of ...That was a great post. I think by being aware of the impact things, like what parents have said allows us to overcome some of the damage,(although I know the hurt may never go), and helps us stop from doing similar things. I think people do and say inconsiderate and hurtful things when they are just not thinking. Awareness is a great thing and thank you for the reminder.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518800171649154035.post-67658670639171084592009-07-04T13:51:20.525-07:002009-07-04T13:51:20.525-07:00Hi Jo,
I just want to say that I do not remember m...Hi Jo,<br />I just want to say that I do not remember my mother ever telling me that I was naughty. But today, I can feel that inside me, and sometimes it is something very small that will trigger it in me. I couldn't tell you right now what my mom might have said , or maybe reacted, to make me take that it into my little girl heart and hold it even still. But still it is there , waiting to sneak up on me and clobber me once again.<br /><br />I think to myself that some of us are particularly sensitive to to some of the subtler communications in human interactions, and we carry it heavily inside us. And others of us, well, not so much.<br /><br /> I receive daily a little "story" sent out by The Story People ( Brian Andreas-I think). One of them I printed out and taped to the fridge, just for those days when I feel like I've been that naughty ( translated:?unlovable) little girl. Let me quote, "Words of Comfort" ---- "There are days I drop words of comfort on myself like falling rain & remember it is enough to be taken care of by myself." It helps sometimes. <br /><br />Give yourself a hug and have a wonerful day.Cythhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13231792119999553947noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1518800171649154035.post-53189041711526773092009-07-04T13:43:32.409-07:002009-07-04T13:43:32.409-07:00I can't imagine you being naughty. Inquisitive...I can't imagine you being naughty. Inquisitive, yes. And that could be perceived as naughty by some people, I suppose. But it's not. You are lovely and compassionate. A kindred spirit, if I ever met one!Country Girlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14432335393660130255noreply@blogger.com