Don't Wait Up...

I have been invited off on adventure today. It has been so long since I have been on an adventure, I have become boring -- even to myself. Does it involve Royalty? No -- even though Charles and Camilla are here in Vancouver today -- they will have to get by without me. Does it involve wearing red shoes? No, but I will be wearing my sexy yellow Wellingtons and my yellow rain slicker.

I'll tell you all about it when I get back. Don't wait up...

My adventure was a wash-out -- literally -- as it rained cats, dogs and I think even some smallish cows these past two days. I have never seen rain like this, even on the We(s)t Coast.

A Sense Of The Ridiculous Is What Makes Us Human

For the past few days I have been at home with a cold / flu, and it has given me time to think. That can be a dangerous thing, when I have idle time on my hands. All sorts of strange ideas meander through my head. Last night as I was contemplating the ceiling life, I suddenly thought, "What are we? What is our purpose?" When you think about it, we are strange creatures -- really, we are just a series of tubes. Stuff goes in, and stuff goes out, and once a day we go unconscious for several hours. But in addition to that, we contain something unique to us -- the human spirit. The scientific definition of spirit is the property of intelligence that drives it to adapt the environment. As a group, civilization develops when several individuals develop the human spirit together. When the results of the human spirit are successful, the consequence is progress. Without the human spirit, our species would become extinct.

But, what is that special something that makes us human, beyond the human spirit? According to science, we share 99% of our DNA with chimpanzees, and yet there is a universe of difference between us. Two things that make us human are laughter and weeping. No other mammal does these things. Some animals do make a sound that mimics (apes) laughter, but it is not humorous laughter. Only human beings are unique in that we have been given the gift of humor. Some folks believe this was part of the evolutionary process, as we climbed out of the primordial soup. Others believe we are God's creatures and laughter was a gift to us. Whatever it is, we need to do more of it. It may just be my imagination, but everyone seems to be so serious, and so sad these days -- full of stress and angst. People are worried about wars, recession, pandemics, finances, unemployment, homelessness -- all creations of the human condition. We need to get back to our sense of the ridiculous.

George Carlin was able to see the absurdity in every aspect of the human condition. Here he is doing one of my favorite routines. Even if you don't like sports, you'll love "Football versus Baseball". Have a chuckle... you deserve it.

The Seventh Foot

Shoes
Vincent Van Gogh
1888

Another severed foot has been found washed ashore in the Lower Mainland. The foot is in a New Balance running shoe, and it matches a woman's foot that washed ashore on May 22nd. The feet started washing ashore in August 2007, and the first foot has been identified, but the man's name is being withheld at the request of his family. A second foot found on Gabriola Island in August 2007 still remains unidentified. Two more feet found on Valdez and Westham Islands in July 2008 belonged to the same man. And two feet found in Richmond in December 2008 belonged to the same woman. The amazing thing is, these feet were identified by searching the DNA database of missing persons.

According to the RCMP, "If you have a foot in a shoe laced up, it protects the integrity of the appendage."

Well, that's good to know...

The other night I watched an amazing program on CBC's "The Passionate Eye" about various theories of the severed feet, narrated by the American actor Peter Coyote. (If you want to watch the whole program, you can click on the link.)

Sometimes truth is stranger than fiction, and the story of these feet is more compelling than any CSI (Miami) (New York) TV show. On television, the case is solved before the final credits run, but in the case of these feet, identification is long and painstaking. But it will be solved. Who are these people? What are their severed feet doing washing ashore?

According to Mike foreman, a research scientist with the federal fisheries department, "The feet are the most recent addition to the collection of body parts carried ashore by the capricious currents of the Georgia Strait. It's not an uncommon occurrence for people to be lost at sea. It probably happens more often than we think," he said. "Body parts are often carried far from where they entered the water because the strait's currents vary depending on tides, winds and fresh water coming from the Fraser River, he said."

Ewwww... Just when you thought it was safe to go back into the water.

Never, Ever, Ever Drink And Drive...!

Simply put, Cognac is the Champagne of brandies. Or you could say Champagne is the Cognac of wines. They are both produced exclusively in France, and both must meet strenuous requirements in order to be called Champagne or Cognac. I have never been overly impressed with Champagne, but I love Cognac. It really is liquid gold. According to French Law, in order to bear the name, Cognac must meet strenuous legal requirements, ensuring that the 300-year old production process remains unchanged. It must be made from at least 90% Ugni Blanc, Folle Blanche, or Colombard grapes, although Ugni Blanc, specifically Saint-Emilion grapes, are today virtually the exclusive variety used. The remainder may consist of the grape varieties Folignan, Jurançon blanc, Meslier St-François (also called Blanc Ramé), Sélect, Montils, and Sémillon, It must be distilled twice in copper pot stills and aged at least two years in French oak barrels, most commonly from oak shipped from all over Europe but passing through the town of Limoges and for that reason called 'limousin' oak. ... Wikipedia

There are various grades of Cognac:

VS Very Special, or ✯✯✯ (three stars) where the youngest brandy is stored at least two years in cask.
VSOP Very Special (less commonly 'Superior') Old Pale, where the youngest brandy is stored at least four years in cask, but the average wood age is much older.
XO Extra Old, where the youngest brandy is stored at least six, but average upwards of 20 years.

I love Cognac, and I have some gorgeous brandy snifters and a little gizmo to heat the Cognac that my daughter gave me for Christmas one year. There is nothing nicer than a warm snifter of Cognac on a cold winter evening, in front of the fireplace. And needless to say, Cognac can be rather expensive, but worth the price. So, when I saw this video on CTV News this morning, I almost fell of my chair laughing. Let it be a warning, never, ever drink and drive, especially in a warehouse full of expensive French Cognac.



The driver of the forklift was drunk, and he wasn't hurt, but oh, the horror, the horror...

All They Need Is For You To Find Them...

A Sunday Afternoon on the Island of La Grande Jatte
Georges-Pierre Seurat
1884

When I first saw this painting by Seurat, I thought it was rather strange-looking -- wooden, in fact. It seemed so very simple, I wondered why it would have taken him two years to paint it. But the more I look at it, the more I am drawn to its sense of movement. Even though the figures appear still, there is a hum of energy to the painting. The people in the park are there in small groups of two and three, and although they appear not to be interacting with each other, they are all connected by the same idea. They have gone to the island in the middle of the River Seine in order to enjoy the park on a Sunday afternoon, and in that they have something in common.

Blogging reminds me a bit of that painting -- we're all blogging basically for the same reason. I have been blogging for almost four years now, and I have seen blogs come and go. Some of the most interesting, well-written blogs on Blogger have more or less died on the vine, while others have gained momentum and thrived. There is no rhyme nor reason to it. I think it may be partly due to timing and luck, it may partly depend on how much time the blogger has to visit other blogs, or it may depend on the particular theme of any one blog. In my travels, I have discovered some extremely well-written, well thought out, fun, informative and entertaining blogs that have almost no commenters or followers at all. Some wonderful little gems get overlooked, and yet those particular blogs may be amongst the best I have ever read. And yes, you know who you are. I'm talking about you -- all of you...

Vase of Flowers
Georges-Pierre Seurat

One of our blogging friends said in an e-mail to me yesterday, "I would love to read and promote new blogs. Let's do something together. Any ideas?" I agree with her, and I have an idea -- a suggestion -- that I think might work. I thought, perhaps, rather than directing people to blogs we like, which can at times feel sort of exclusive and someone may be left out, why don't we do something inclusive and exchange blogrolls. That is to say, one day a week, instead of going to our regular blogs that we visit, why don't we click on someone else's blogroll instead. I have 155 blogs on my blog roll, they are all well worth a visit, and I invite you to visit them. Some of them truly are undiscovered gems. Some of them are astonishing in their honesty and candour. Others will amaze you with their beautiful writing, painting and photography, and some are just plain fun. All they need is for you to find them.

Guilt-Free Cocoa...!

Now that summer is over, the patio furniture has been put away, and the ice has stopped clinking in the lemonade pitchers, it's time for that other necessity of life -- cocoa. There is almost nothing more wonderful than a rich, dark, hot cup of cocoa. No -- not hot chocolate -- real cocoa, made with 100% cocoa. Have you ever read the ingredients on a package of instant hot chocolate? Modified milk ingredients, milk powder, cocoa, carrageenan, salt, artificial flavor, sucralose, acesulfame-potassium (huh?), soy and wheat. I don't know what half of those are. The ingredients in cocoa powder? Cocoa.

The Aztecs called chocolate the food of the gods, and Moctezuma, the Aztec emperor, drank cocoa from a golden goblet, served with a golden spoon. According to a study published in the Journal of the American Medical Association, a cup of hot cocoa is full of powerful antioxidants. A study of 8,000 Americans found that cocoa may even extend life. In another study done by Dr. Chang Yong Lee at Cornell University, cocoa had twice as many antioxidants as red wine, and three times as many as green tea. In yet another study published in Science Daily, cocoa contains a compound called epicatechin, and apparently the health benefits of this compound rival the benefits of penicillin. Dr. Norman Hollenberg, a professor medicine at Harvard Medical school, spent years studying the benefits of cocoa on the Kuna people in Panama. He found that the risk of four of the five most common killer diseases: stroke, heart failure, cancer and diabetes, is reduced to less then 10% in these folks, and they drink up to 40 cups of cocoa a week.

Well, my goodness, is there any more proof that drinking cocoa -- guilt-free -- is actually good for us? Besides warming our bodies and souls, this wonderful food actually provides health benefits. Who knew! When I was a little girl, my father's cure for anything was a cup of cocoa, made from scratch using Fry's cocoa powder. And he always served it in an antique cocoa set that had belonged to his family. It was quite a special ritual, and no matter what ailment my brothers and I were suffering from, my Dad's cup of cocoa always did the trick. I still use his recipe and it's wonderful.

1. 1 heaping tablespoon of Fry’s cocoa powder.
2. 1 heaping tablespoon of finely granulated sugar
3. Dash of salt
4. 1 tablespoon of boiling water
5. 1/2 teaspoon of real vanilla extract
6. 1 cup of hot milk (2% is good)
7. Whipped cream or marshmallows, if desired

In a pot on the stove, over medium high heat, mix the cocoa powder, sugar and water. Add a little milk, stirring well. Add the remaining milk, and heat until steaming hot, but do not allow it to boil. Pour the cocoa into your favorite mug and add some whipped cream or marshmallows if you wish. Enjoy! Cocoa, what a body needs...

Samantha The She-Devil Cat

It wouldn't be Halloween without my telling you the story of Samantha The Demon Cat, who still haunts me. She was not a cat. Oh, she looked like a cat, and people often mistook her for a cat, but she was not cat. She was a demon straight from the bowels of Hades. She was very, very wicked and she was a drug addict as well. I didn't own her, she owned me. She let me live with her, as long as I fed her, gave her all my attention -- 24/7 -- and gave her drugs. I was her pusher, I was her enabler, I was her co-dependent. Our relationship was dysfunctional and pathological, and she had complete control over my every waking moment.

Oh, yes, Samantha the She-Devil Cat.

Samantha was very possessive of me. She insisted on being close to me at all times. If I went from one room to another, she would follow me. If I sat down, she would sit next to me. When I went to bed, she climbed in with me. Often when I fell asleep, she would howl like a banshee to wake me up. One night, in sheer exhaustion, I put her into a closet, only to wake up an hour later to find her lying next to me. I put her back into the closet, and pulled my heavy beveled glass coffee table in front of the closet door. It wouldn't budge, and it held the closet door tightly shut. I woke up an hour later with Samantha next to me, sound asleep, the coffee table pushed out of the way and the closet door wide open. The Hounds of The Baskervilles had nothing on Samantha. She would have made mincemeat of them.

She was jealous of anyone who came near me, and several of my family and friends still bear the scars to prove it. If I spoke on the phone with anyone, Samantha would pace back and forth bellowing, "Oh, yah, oh yah, oh yah, OH YAH..." People would ask me, "What the h*ll is that!?"

Funny you should ask...

I loved Samantha, though. She was not like any creature I had ever known. There are nights when I'm lying in bed and I can still feel her cold nose on my foot, and hear her rustling at the end of my bed. If any living creature would have found a way to come back, it would have been Samantha.

The Seven Beauties...

This photograph is considered scandalous. Yes it is. In the 21st Century when anything goes, and we have seen the private parts of almost every celebrity, either in movies or in print, this photograph has caused a huge sensation. But, it's not for the reason you may think. This photograph is considered shocking because it is a photo of plus-sized models. Yes! Plus-sized, as in larger than size 4. These women are considered chubby, plump, portly, large -- fat. Can you believe it?

The woman on the left is considered a "normal" woman -- used in advertising to represent "real" women. She is the image that advertisers use to sell products to women. Women who don't fit this template don't buy the products. So they change their bodies to fit the standard, and develop eating disorders in the process. The woman on the right is a "plus-size" model and is considered fat. Many modelling agencies -- including Janice Dickinson's agency -- refuse to hire plus-size models such as this woman.

In the movie "The Devil Wears Prada", Nigel snootily informs Andrea that they have nothing that would fit her, because she is a size 6, and all their samples are from 0 to 4. What is a size 0 anyway? Is that for someone who has no body? Designer fashions stop at size 10 or 12. If you wear a size 14, good luck in trying to find designer fashions. When I was 18 years old, I weighed 120 pounds and wore a size 10. By today's standards that is plus-sized, because the sizes have been reduced, but unfortunately women's bodies have not. The average Canadian or American woman is 5 ft. 4 in. tall and weighs 140 pounds. In other words -- plus size! And believe me, no one will ever mistake me for the woman on the left.

Let's get real and start celebrating our curves again. When we came into this world, God did not provide us with an air brush.

Adjourning Sine Die

It would appear the swine flu H1N1 virus is cutting a swath through our office, which means I don't have time for my favorite activity -- blogging -- at the moment. I am taking up all the slack for all the overload work. I have all sorts of ideas for posts and no time to do them *sigh* and no time to visit my favorite blogs.

I am of two minds about the H1N1 vaccine. I believe it is probably necessary, but at the same time, I wonder how safe it is. Do I want to be on the receiving end of an "uh-oh" moment? As in ,"Uh-oh, we didn't know it had those side effects..." Maybe I'll wait.

Have a wonderful week, everyone, and don't have too much fun out there without me.

Amelia Earhart Or Irene Bolam...?

The story of Amelia Earhart is one that has always fascinated me, and now there is a new movie about her, and I can hardly wait to see it. To me, the really interesting part of her story begins when she disappeared on her final approach to Howland Island in the South Pacific, and no trace of her or her plane has ever been found. There are all sorts of theories as to what happened to her, and why she was unable to locate Howland Island. Some of the theories seem plausible, and other stretch the limits of the imagination. One theory that I had not heard until recently is that Earhart did in fact make it back to the United States, and lived the rest of her life as a woman named Irene Bolam.

(Click to enlarge)

Photographs of the two women were superimposed on each other, and it was claimed that they were such a close match, even the tear ducts were the same. It's much like the story of Anna Anderson, who claimed to be the Grand Duchess Anastasia of Russia, the only surviving member of the Imperial House of Romanov, who were assassinated by the Bolsheviks. Anderson's story has since been proven false, and I believe the claim that Irene Bolam was actually Amelia Earhart is false as well. But it is an interesting theory, and adds a whole new twist to the mystery.

One day Earhart's plane -- if there is anything left of it -- will be located somewhere at the bottom of the South Pacific Ocean, much the same way the "Titanic" was discovered. Until then, it's always fun to speculate about what really happened to these larger than life people. Folks still continue to spot Elvis filling his car's gas tank at a local gas station. Of course, he still looks the same as he did 32 years ago. And Andy Kaufman is alive and well, and living quietly somewhere as Tony Clifton.

Somehow these implausible and impossible theories are always much more fun, though, aren't they? It is said that truth is stranger than fiction, but that's not true at all. Oh, by the way, have you heard? When NASA crashed a probe onto the moon a couple of weeks ago looking for water, they found Bigfoot living up there. Who knew!?