Room in New York
I was raised with two older brothers, and I have always been more comfortable in the company of men than in the company of women. Instinctively, I have a better rapport with men. This has puzzled me over the years -- why should there be a difference between women and men, and what is the difference betwen them that I am unable to define? Yesterday it occurred to me. There are two types of people -- those who like everyone when they first meet them, until they are proven otherwise, and those who are suspicious of everyone when they first meet them. I'm probably over-generalizing here, but it seems to me that women fall into the first category, and men into the second. Men, somehow, seem to be more laid-back, less guarded, whereas women generally are a bit apprehensive about new people. With men, there is always less "drama" about everything. As I said, I may be over-generalizing, but that has been my experience. No matter how you slice it, it's true that women can sometimes form cliques, which seem to form a protective barrier against "new" people.
A clique is an exclusive group of people who share interests, views, purposes, patterns of behavior, or ethnicity. A clique as a reference group can be either normative or comparative. Membership in a clique is often, but not necessarily, exclusive, and qualifications for membership may be social or essential to the nature of the clique. The term 'clique' may be used pejoratively. A normative clique or reference group is often the primary source of social interaction for the members of the clique, which can affect the values and beliefs of an individual. The comparative clique or reference group is a standard of comparison in which a clique can exist in the workplace, in a community, in the classroom, in a business, or any other area of social interaction.
Cliques tend to form within the boundaries of a larger group where opportunities to interact are great. Cliques are often associated with children and teenagers in a classroom setting. Schools are a prime place where peer networks exist and can easily be accentuated through the differentiation of various cliques, and through the processes of inclusion and exclusion that characterize a clique. ... Wikipedia
Men rarely form cliques, women almost always do. So this made me wonder, is there some genetic, socialogical or biological reason for this? Does it have something to do with men being the "hunter / gatherers" while women stayed at home and tended the fires? Is it a sexual thing? Is it an instinct for the protection of children? It would be interesting to know. But, ask any woman -- there is nothing more threatening to a woman than a group of women to which we do not belong. The thought of it can actually make the hairs on the backs of our necks stand on end.
I am one of those people who instinctively likes everyone until they have done something to change my opinion of them -- but once they have, there is no going back. I can say, however, that I have never belonged to a clique, even when I was in school. The very thought of it is an anathema to me.
There is a new council in my building, consisting of seven women. Individually, they are all lovely people, and all of them are good friends of mine. We socialize, and as neighbors, we help each other. As a group -- well, let's just say I will be keeping a low profile for the next year.