Tuesday, June 23, 2009

The Centipede

This guy was lonely and so he decided life would be more fun if he had a pet. So he went to the pet store and told the owner that he wanted to buy an unusual pet. After some discussion he finally bought a centipede, which came in a little white box to use for his house.

He took the box home, found a good location for the box, and decided he would start off by taking his new pet to the bar for a drink. So he asked the centipede in the box, "Would you like to go to Frank's place with me and have a beer?" But there was no answer from his new pet.

This bothered him a bit, but he waited a few minutes and then asked him again, "How about going to the bar and having a drink with me?" But again there was no answer from his new pet. So he waited a few minutes more, thinking about the situation.

He decided to ask him one more time. This time putting his face up against the centipede's house and shouting, "Hey, in there! Would you like to go to Frank's place and have a drink with me?"

A little voice came out of the box: "I heard you the first time ! I'm putting my #%^&*@# shoes on!"

34 comments:

lovelyprism said...

LOL... I always loved that joke. I don't know who would possibly be offended by your last post. I'm surprised with the number of followers you have that you even noticed! I certainly wasn't offended. :-)

Russell said...

Tell you what. If you keep putting up posts about skinny dipping and paintings of nude women, I have a strong feeling your followers list will grow -- not shrink!! Heh!

As for me, I will be offended if you change what you have been doing for the last few years!

And, as mentioned earlier, I hope you take your camera with you to the record setting skinny dipping event and be sure to have someone take some pictures of you for us!!

You are going to participate, right?? I mean, half of Vancouver will be there and it WILL be the place to be, uh, see and be seen!!

Patsy said...

What post about skinny dipping? Where?
~Lorna

larkspur said...

I'm taking my *(#$%@^ shoes off for the skinny dippin' event!

Thx, Jo, for your nice comment. (I know you know where Ames, IA is ;}

meggie said...

LOL. I had to laugh at the Skinny dipping post. I am sure people join & leave my 'followers' all the time, & I have no idea why!
Enjoyed my catchup.

the walking man said...

bet he HAS to shop at Payless too.

Avril Fleur said...

I can't remember where I read this or who said it first, but I love the quote "what other people think of me is none of my business". In other words, don't give a second thought about offending anyone through your writing. If they don't like it, they are free to leave, as they obviously have. The rest of us can continue to enjoy and appreciate your wonderful posts.

Bagman and Butler said...

Good one!

Leah Fry said...

I must have just fallen off the back of the turnip truck, because I never heard the joke before. Very cute.

Anonymous said...

That's so cute!!

PhilipH said...

Good job it was a centipede; they have only one pair of legs per body segment.

Had he chosen a millipede for his pet he'd wait much longer: they have two pairs of legs per segment.

Mine's a gin and tonic please!

The Bug said...

I'm just picturing all the cute little shoes...

Miss_Nobody said...

LOL that was cool

Patty said...

How funny, I'm still laughing out loud and husband is looking at me like I'm crazy.

Jennifer D said...

I loved the Skinny dipping post! Actually I love All of your posts. Keep it up, please! All those shoes, ha ha

Katy said...

That's funny! I'll have to tell my daughter that joke. She is always coming home from school with new funny stories and I never have any.

TC said...

I hadn't heard the joke either and it's one I can remember other than my two other crude ones. Thanks

Faithful said...

Jo--I've been away for awhile..and it is so good to be back! I missed reading your posts... and now I have to catch up. You are such a pleasure.
Skinny-dipping? How could anyone get offended over nature in it's finest attire? And it is such a complimentary name ...SKINNY dipping! I'm a little bashful tho..have done it in the dark and with my shoes left on.. that way I'm not totally naked! I think..everyone should try it at least once!

Charles Gramlich said...

No shoes, no shirt, no service?

Bobbie said...

Thanks for the chuckle, Josie.

I'm still following your blog but haven't commented much lately. Take care and hope you enjoy this rainy day.

jackc50 said...

i love to skinny dip, it's the only way to go......hell, i shower au natural so swimming sans clothing is no big deal.....bye 4 now, jack c..ps. if you do go post some pics..heehee

Deedee said...

Centipedes don't mince words.

ivan said...

Ha ha ha ha ha ha!

The story has legs!

ivan said...

Ha ha ha ha ha ha!

The story has legs!

Burcu said...

Hahaahahha:) That was a good one Jo! You made my day and i'll tell about this story to my colleagues.

Have a nice day!

Cheers

persiflage said...

What did one male centipede say to the other male centipede as the lady centipede walked past?
Nice pair of legs, pair of legs, pair of legs, pair of legs, pair of legs......
Sometimes the jokes that we've known for the last 50 years or so remain funny. I think so, anyway.

laughingwolf said...

lol... superb! ;)

PhilipH said...

Wonder what they'd sound like if wearing clogs?

Something like a stampede of horses perhaps, (clippety clop ad infinitum...)

Swetha said...

does he have all his shoes stuffed inside his that box??! ...

its a funny post dear!

Brenda said...

That would be a lot of shoes! Have a great day!

Rose said...

*grins* Cute.

muthu said...

ROFL......

that was a nice one.... :)

loved it. :D

nomore said...

It's very funny a story.....

Paula Slade said...

That's FUNNY!!!! Thanks Jo for the sunshine! :-D