Friday, August 7, 2009

The Little White Lie...

Have you ever told a little white lie?

Alice, new to the community, was asked to bake a cake for the Baptist Church Ladies' Group in Tuscaloosa, but she forgot to do it until the morning of the bake sale. After rummaging through her cabinets, Alice found an angel food cake mix and quickly made it while she was getting ready for work, drying her hair, and helping her son pack for Scout camp.

When Alice took the cake from the oven, the center had dropped flat and the cake was ruined. She thought, "Oh goodness, there's no time now to bake another cake."

This cake was important to Alice because she wanted to fit in with the folks at her new church and in her new community. So, being inventive, she looked around the house for something to build up the center of the cake. Alice found it in the bathroom - a roll of toilet paper. She plopped the toilet paper into the center of the cake and covered it with icing. The finished product looked beautiful.

Before dropping the cake off at the church and heading for work, Alice woke her daughter Amanda and gave her money to attend the bake sale as soon as it opened at 9:30, with instructions to buy the cake and bring it home. When Amanda arrived at the sale, she discovered her mother’s beautiful cake had already been sold. She phoned her mother to give her the bad news, and Alice was horrified. Everyone would find out about her cake. What would they think? She would be ridiculed and ostracized. That night, Alice lay awake in bed, thinking about the scandal her toilet roll cake would create. How would she ever be able to face her new friends.

The following day, Alice had been invited to attend a bridal shower at the home of a fellow church member. Alice was reluctant to attend, because the hostess was a snob from one of the founding families of Tuscaloosa, who had looked down her nose at Alice. However, having RSVPd, Alice couldn't think of a believable excuse to stay home. She attended the luncheon and tried not to think about the cake.

The meal was elegant and the company was as Alice had expected -- snobbish. At the end of the meal, and to Alice's horror, the cake in question was presented to the luncheon guests for dessert. Alice felt the blood drain from her body when she saw her cake. She began to tell the hostess not to serve the cake, but before she could get the words out, the Mayor's wife said, "What a beautiful cake!" ... to which the hostess replied,

"Thank you, I baked it myself..."

Alice smiled as she thought, "God is a woman, and She has a sense of humor."

33 comments:

Marguerite said...

Great story! A similar thing happened to me many years ago. I was luckier, because I got the cake back before my error was exposed. Hilarious! Have a fun weekend!

SparkleFarkle said...

Now THIS is a story! You get the Bloggy Gold Star of the week! (I think I'll make my dear sister-in-law a cake like that for her November birthday-- thanks for the recipe!)

PinkPanthress said...

Good, great & gorgeous Story... made me giggle! ;)

(phew, 4 G's)

The Bug said...

Now I have to tell my hubby why I'm laughing out loud at my computer! Thank goodness you didn't post this during my work hours!

Jennifer D said...

OH MY!!!

I felt the frustration, than the horror, than the JOY!!

Sooo funny.

A.M. said...

That was awesome, I was on the floor laughing. Cute story :o) It's funny b/c I know a lot of snobs like that. Hey, you might know a few lol

TC said...

Satisfaction thy name is woman. Great story.

Whitney Lee said...

I love it! This is why I don't bake; I'm not creative enough to fix the faux pas in such a manner:)

Nancy said...

LOL! Great story.

the walking man said...

Why do they make those cake pans with that tower thingy in them? I always thought is was there to have a cardboard tube in it. At least I thought so whenever I ate one of moms cakes, they always tasted like cardboard.

And the dear woman never made any bones about it...if she wanted a good cake for a party she had the old man make it. He made eight layer torte cakes from scratch no mix involved.

PhilipH said...

An Oscar-winning tale Jo. What a result for the plucky Alice - or should that be the Lucky Alice?

I've NEVER told a white lie! Believe me, it's true.

Excuse me, have to dash off to the doctor; my nose is getting longer by the second.

Russell said...

One of my favorite expressions is to learn to "read between the lies"! Heh!

It comes in handy in the legal business...!

Carla said...

Love it!!

Judi said...

Funny! How did my town, Tuscaloosa, end up in the story? Sounds like something that would happen here! One just doesn't hear it referred to that often. There was the Groucho Marx line in Animal Crackers, "While shooting elephants in Africa, I found the tusks very difficult to remove. But in Alabama, the Tuscaloosa..."

Pat said...

Enjoyed the story! It had a great ending and Alice came out a winner!

C Hummel Kornell a/k/a C Hummel Wilson said...

Come on, now, take a look around our great county (the U.S.). There are legals living in the depth of poverty on our streets, not just drunkards and druggies, but entire families who have lost everything. Children are growing up here never having known a 'home', never tasting a home cooked meal, never sleeping a night without fear. We choose to turn a blind eye to these citizens who need and deserve our sympathy and support. Instead we rage our bleeding hearts against the ills around the globe and feel sorry for all these other peoples. Well, I can tell you having lived in Tucson, AZ for a time that the illegals who cross our borders are costing this country in ways that will never be recouped. The local hospitals who are made to treat these people free (while our citizens can be turned away if they don't have insurance) are losing millions every year. It's not just me saying this, it's printed in the Tucson papers in hard dollar amounts as to what treating the illegals cost them and (you guessed it) costs us, the American taxpayer!

Show me a day when we can care for our homeless, sick, aging and orphaned adequately and I will gladly extend my hand to help the illegals. Until that time, I say they need to remain in their own countries.

C Hummel Kornell a/k/a C Hummel Wilson said...

Sorry, the prior comment posted to the wrong posting...I can't delete it, so will repost it in the correct place.

Your Little White Lie posting is wonderful. I've always felt God, if not a woman, certainly can plug into female wiles at times.

Deedee said...

Oh, JO! I SO hope this story is true! What a great example of poetic justice! I would have LOVED to see the look on the face of the hostess when they cut into that cake...

Patty said...

Great story, glad Alice didn't reveal the toilet paper. Wonder what the woman did when she cut into the paper? Would loved to have heard her comment.

Land of shimp said...

That was an absolutely delightful story!

Was it Diogenes who was doomed to search the world with a lantern, looking for an honest man? An endless, fruitless task.

Thank goodness, eh? Can you imagine truthful answers to some questions? "Is the pork okay?" "Dry as the Sahara and about as much fun to chew." "I'm not sure about this new hair color, what do you think?" "You look decades older, and as if you primarily wouldn't be found in nature."

It would be a disaster.

Kathy's Klothesline said...

Love it!

Alissa said...

Wonderful story. It brought a smile to my face!

Nicole said...

Ah! I love stories like this :-)

robert said...

Until tonight did not know that lies do have colours.
What a nice one however it was to read. Wish you a nice Sunday.

lovelyprism said...

LOL, that was great!

Russell said...

Okay. I am going to post another comment. I am sure you are thrilled...!

When is a lie not a lie? That was something I struggled with as a parent when my daughter would ask. Of course that was when she was under the age of 11, but that is another story.

Do you like my new haircut? Do you like the meal I made? Do you think I am attractive? Do you like the present I gave you?

I mean, talk about mine fields! Sometimes the answer is somewhere in between yes and no. Maybe I think your haircut is, well, not the best but what good does it do if I say so? I might try to find a way to get around it such as "it's a great haircut for the summer since it is so short!" But....

When is a lie not a lie???

Pondering in Iowa...!

Breath-e said...

Oooohhh, thank you for such a lovely story!! I needed that!

Carol E. said...

That is a great story! LOL!!!

A human kind of human said...

Love this story. Sounds like the type of cakes I would bake. I even flop cakes made with instant cake mixes.

B said...

This is fantastic!

Thanks for sharing :)

John said...

That was a brilliant story! So funny, and some very creative writing! at I think you should send in to Readers Digest for publishing and be paid! * * * * *

Paula Slade said...

What a great story Jo! It really made me smile ear-to-ear!

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