I must say, the more I read about other places in the world, the more partial I am to my funny, idiosyncratic country -- from poutine and beaver tails (don't ask...) to Stompin' Tom Connors. I grew up listening to CBC radio and watching CBC television, and thinking, "What a boring country I live in; nothing ever happens here." But I have come to the conclusion that I rather like it that way. When I was a teenager, all I wanted to do was to head for the bright lights of New York City. How exciting it would have been to live in the absolute centre of the world. I have since come to realize, however, that Canada is the centre of the world. Oh, yes it is. We are situated squarely between the old-world, traditional British sense and sensibilities, and the new-world, colorful and brazen jazzy American culture and way of life. Canadians have managed to extract the best of both worlds, and we have added a dash of our own to the mix.
In a few months the world will be coming to Vancouver for the 2010 Olympics, so I thought I would give everyone a crash course in speaking and understanding Canuck, otherwise known as Canajun. A couple of months ago I gave you a few examples of Canajun, and here are a few more important terms you will need to know.
Mazkidda: The national insect of Canada. A kind of gnat whose bite causes a prolonged itching sensation. Mzakidda-swatting contests are staged every spring at cottage-opening time.
Horble: Extremely unpleasant, as weather, a noise, mazkiddas, etc.
Gradge: A building for storing or repairing automobiles.
Forner: A non-Canadian. The adjective is Forn.
Chewsdy: The day after Mundy (the day after Sundy).
Tamara: The day after today.
Yesday: The day preceding today.
Inta Resting: Arousing curiosity or attention.
Egg Sellent: Very good, of considerable merit.
Egg Spurt: Someone with special skill or knowledge.
Boddum: The lowest part; the backside. Used as a toast: "Boddum Zup!"
Kenya: Are you able to? As in: "Kenya stop whatcher doon en gimmier hand?" The negative form is Kentcha.
Furn Chur: Movable articles in a room, such as tables, chairs, etc.
Swedder: A knitted woolen garment covering the upper part of the body.
Yaskt: To make all necessary enquiries, to request information, as in: "I'm awfully glad yaskt."
And here is Stompin' Tom Connors with the real national anthem of Canada.