Thursday, May 14, 2009

Sleeping At Work

We had a meeting at work yesterday, and it was the usual yada, yada, yada. We have a few problems that need to be addressed, but for the moment they are being solved with band-aid solutions. One person suggested fluorescent Post-it notes, someone else suggested white-out, I don't remember what some of the other suggestions were. We will try them and they will work for a while. It's just the usual growing pains, of course, but trial and error... However, at one point in the meeting I glanced across the boardroom table at one of my co-workers, and she was sound asleep. She was sitting up straight, her hands folded in front of her on the table -- asleep. It was all I could do to keep from laughing.

Today she said to me, "Did you happen to notice that I nodded off during the meeting yesterday?"

"Yes, it did not escape me entirely..."

Today I found ten excuses folks can use if they get caught sleeping at work:

1. "They told me at the blood bank this might happen."

2. "This is just a 15 minute power-nap like they raved about in the last time management course you sent me to."

3. "Whew! Guess I left the top off the liquid paper."

4. "I wasn't sleeping! I was meditating on the mission statement and envisioning a new paradigm!"

5. "This is one of the seven habits of highly effective people!"

6. "I was testing the keyboard for drool resistance."

7. "Actually I'm doing a "Stress Level Elimination Exercise Plan" (SLEEP). I learned it at the last mandatory seminar you made me attend."

8. "The coffee machine is broken."

9. "I was doing a highly specific Yoga exercise to relieve work related stress."

10. "Darn! Why did you interrupt me? I had almost figured out a solution to our biggest problem."

Number 4 is my favorite. Now it's late, and I'm off to get some sleep.

24 comments:

Lone Grey Squirrel said...

Thank you for such useful excuses. So much easier than trying to sleep with eyes kept open by discrete application of sticky tape.

Miss_Nobody said...

Number 4 and 2 are the best lol,useful too heh

tinkerbell the bipolar faery said...

I often used to sleep at work, but of course that was during a prescribed break, on a 12-hour night shift! Love no. 1 the best.

KathyB. said...

Funny!Florescent post it notes might help keep you awake....or give you an excuse to wear sun-glasses inside, thereby disguising the fact that you are asleep....ahem...meditating.

nomore said...

I just suppose once the famouse book from the Number 5...

the walking man said...

"Just because my eyes are closed, I'm drooling and you hear me snoring does not mean I was asleep...I was training for my expected promotion to management.)

greenpanda said...

Number 1 and 6 are my faves. Brilliant. Although 8 is good..... hmmm...........

A human kind of human said...

Gee thanks, these will come in handy. Long boring meetings is a trade mark of my workplace and even if I, as secretary, doze off I doubt that anyone will notice.

Sleeping in meetings has also become a national passtime over the last couple of years. There on national TV the other night, for the whole nation to see, was one of our new parliamentarians, fast asleep in a lecture to orientate the new members of parliament. So there, sleeping in meetings, class, etc. is now quite acceptable in good old SA.

mo'ikeha said...

Actually I did fell asleep a few times during work (as a teacher, imagen only the fun on the students face) as I am in charge of the 'night shift' taking care of me son.
Maybe worth to be a further excuse ;)

The Bug said...

I keep threatening to just stop the pretenses & bring in a futon to put in our spare office. My only problem is what to do about my bed head...

Dee said...

I've done that. I had to carry a beeper and, more than once, it gave me an excuse to leave. Most meetings were a waste of time for me, not relavent to my department.

Kathy's Klothesline said...

I will often catch a quick nap on a Saturday afternoon sitting in my comfy chair behind the check-in counter. If some one comes in the buzzer sounds and I can usually get my wits together before the reach the counter. I blink my eyes and wipe the drool before I stand up and then remember...... I own the place and I can nap if I want to!

DUTA said...

It happened to me once , not at work but at the traditional Passover meal. I drank a little red wine, and there I was, sitting asleep.

Alissa said...

Proofreading in a hot office with poor ventilation did it to me, and I was not alone. If I did not remember to open the side panel on my computer by about 4 p.m. it too would zonk out by simply shutting itself down.

At my last job there was a certain employee who was caught sound asleep (face on her keyboard) a couple of times by her boss, she also had this tendency of suddenly leaving early to go play golf. Interestingly enough, she still works there. I should check and see which excuse she used.

Lover of Life said...

LOL!! I like #10!

Russell said...

No question - #4 is the BEST! Heh!

One of my all time least favorite words is paradigm or any expression that includes that term. It is usually used by people under 30 who are academics and have absolutely no idea what they are talking about!

I have stopped a person more than once and asked them to tell me what the term means. They always look at me with the deer in the headlights look...!

Great post! (Of course!)

Kimberly said...

It takes something amazing to hold my attention --- work related meetings are not amazing in my book, therefore I sleep.

Donnetta Lee said...

I like number 4 and also number 2! My supervisor caught one of the people I was supervising napping at her desk with her door closed. So of course, I was directed to discipline this young lady. Well, I did. I told her that our "big" supervisor had caught her napping. She went ballistic and never spoke to me again. hahaha D

Samantha said...

I love #1 if I was really trying to get out of trouble! :)
And I agree #4 is a great one, lol.

Owen said...

I've never understood why there seems to be such a taboo among humans about sleeping in public places or at work... a short cat nap can do a world of good sometimes, if our mind chemistry is saying sleep, then we should be comfortable just nodding off for a while... and if the janitor has to roust us out after everyone else has gone home, well, that shouldn't be a source of shame...

I suppose one additional "answer" to the boss who chideds you for sleeping in meeting one could add to your charming list here is : "Excuse me, I was temporarily overcome by the cloud of sheer boredom emanating from the ceiling vents in this meeting room."

bearbear said...

I will be 60 years old in 5 days and as long as I can remember, I used to sit in church and watch my mother sleep (and sometimes she was singing in the choir so everyone in the congregation could see her!). Now that I'm the age I am, I realize that my poor mother was always, always, tired and never was completely rested. She's 82 yrs. old now and still with us and still nods off sitting up when there is activity all around her. I wonder if she ever did that at work?

Paula Slade said...

I liked number 1 - it gave me a good chuckle! :-D

amourissima said...

There was (yes, was...) a girl who worked in the office across from me. One day I saw her come in, sit at her desk and then disappear. Most of the day I noticed that she wasn't in her office but her light stayed on. Finally in the mid afternoon my curiosity got the better of me and took a little peak. There she was all curled up with a blanket under her desk. She'd been sleeping under her desk most of the day getting up every few hours to go for a smoke break.

I come how doubt that none of your wonderful excuses could have worked for her situation.

Ruth D~ said...

Ha! Been there done that. ZZZZZzzzzzzzzz. No excuse but that the meetings came at the end of a long days's work, and provided the first chance to sit . . .